A Long Run of Eight Kilometers

After a long gap, I went for a run again today. I ran it according to the half-marathon plan in Zepp, 8 kilometers, and it felt okay, I guess. Only toward the end my right abdomen felt a bit uncomfortable. That is because I hadn't run in a long time.

For the first 2~3 kilometers, both my knees felt somewhat uncomfortable. I didn't stop, I kept running, and by the middle of the run that discomfort had lessened. Now that I have stopped, I can no longer feel any discomfort in my knees.

Running is a very good way to clear your own head. Daily work is too rushed — every day you go to work and come home on time, eat, go to work and come home, sleep. A person is like a wound-up alarm clock, ticking without pause. Running is a way that lets a person free themselves from that tense rhythm. It lets you properly think about your own life, properly think about yourself, about what kind of life you want to live.

There are countless people in this world. Every one of them is choosing a way of life that suits them. I am choosing too, but I haven't found it yet; pain, doubt, unease — all kinds of feelings, always close by. What is a person's purpose in living in this world, and what is the meaning of it? How can I make myself happy, how do I find the person I love? Questions like these linger in my mind and go unanswered for a long time.

Wanting badly to gain some ability, yet unwilling to put in the effort and study hard — that is my current state. If I want to make a breakthrough, I need to change this state.

As work gets busier, the moments when I write down what I think become fewer and fewer, and my daily diary is only two or three lines, rarely anything deep or carefully considered. I don't blame myself for writing so little; I just think: oh, this is my current state. It seems I can't calm down and record a whole day of my life. It should change slowly, I suppose. I'm not sure how things will develop from here.